Jeff Van Lith: Our representatives have the chance to save children’s lives

By Jeff Van Lith

It’s been nearly four years since I found my 13-year-old son Ethan lifeless in his room. “It’s not what it looks like,” explained the paramedic, who, unlike me, was all too familiar with the viral TikTok challenge called the “choking game” or “blackout challenge.” Still, the situation made no sense.

Ethan was smart, a straight-A student, who’d always exhibited sound judgment. He was athletic and fearless – mastering bicycle stunts and Pogo stick aerobatics – but never reckless, and he never had a bad day. He was all happiness and kindness, the type of kid who made a point of identifying and befriending classmates who didn’t have any friends. He played baseball and loved animals and the outdoors. While he also enjoyed playing video games, we’d installed parental control software on his devices that limited his screen time, much of which Ethan spent watching funny, innocuous YouTube videos that he liked to share with his family.

My son and I had an open and honest relationship, one that included frank discussions about the eternal lifespan of errant posts. It turns out the choking game was a prime example. Unbeknownst to me, it had been populating the social media feeds of tweens and teenagers since 2008 and had already claimed the lives of hundreds of young people who, like Ethan, died of accidental asphyxiation while attempting the challenge.

Ethan is just one of thousands of children who has died because of dangerous content on social media, and that content comes in many forms. Children are dying because of perilous TikTok challenges; because of fentanyl-laced drugs they were able to purchase online; and from suicide, the rates of which have skyrocketed among youth in response to online bullying and sextortion threats against minors.

And yet, despite the innovation and immense growth of social media and technology, not a single law regulating social media has been passed in 25 years. It is inexcusable and unconscionable, particularly when there is a growing body of research and testimony from multiple whistleblowers about the severe dangers to our children’s mental and physical health from using platforms like Facebook, Instagram, Snap Chat, TikTok and others. Lawmakers have done nothing. Absolutely nothing.

We need Congress to pass the Kids Online Safety Act of 2023. This long overdue bill would impose a “duty of care” on social media platforms requiring them to act in the best interest of our children by enhancing default privacy settings and allowing users to turn off recommendation algorithms and other addictive features. It would allow the Federal Trade Commission to regulate social media companies, force tech moguls to share their internal research and require an annual independent audit to ensure compliance with the bill.

KOSA will, without a doubt, save lives. It might very well have saved Ethan’s.

The people of Washington state have been leaders in recognizing the need for this type of legislation, with a recent study noting that 93% of Washington voters are concerned that social media use may harm the health and well-being of children and teens; 54% believe that parents today do not have the tools they need to ensure their children are safe online; and 79% believe that tech companies need to do more.

Sen. Maria Cantwell has also played an important role, shepherding the Kids Online Safety Act through a successful markup through the Senate Commerce Committee. The bill now has an astounding 66 cosponsors in the Senate – 33 from both parties.

Unfortunately, the House has not shown the commitment to children’s online safety. In fact, KOSA hasn’t even been introduced on the House side. Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers has the power to do this, and it’s up to Washington residents to reinforce to her the urgency and obligation.

Losing Ethan shattered my universe. Two hours before he died, he called me at work to let me know that he’d finished packing for the camping trip we were to embark on the next morning. We made plans to take the jet ski to Lake Washington that evening as soon as I got home. I figured he’d pass the intervening time in idle anticipation of these father-son adventures. I never heard his voice again.

Nothing can bring Ethan back, but KOSA can save other families this unimaginable pain. We need to pass this lifesaving legislation in 2024, children’s lives depend on it.

Jeff Van Lith is an advocate for social media reform, a founding member of Parents for Safe Online Spaces (Parents SOS), and a medical sales professional. He resides in Bellevue.