A Grip on Sports: Why hire just a coach when, with the right investment, you can import an entire new football program these days

A GRIP ON SPORTS • We’re sort of hungover today. No, not from alcohol. That’s not our way. Sugary, sweet treats. That’s the ticket. Or, if you prefer, how we backslide these days.

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• We’ve been trying to slim down since August. Been pretty successful at it. If losing about 40 pounds can be considered a success. We still have a few more to go, sure, because goals are about the only way for us to ever get anything done. Which puts us in a weird spot.

Every once in a while we get a craving. We must have chocolate. Why? Ask a nutritionist or someone. We have no idea. Most days we just tell the body’s urges to go away. Let us alone. And, finally, we drive the demon back to the recesses of our mind. But yesterday, that guy was relentless. Overwhelming. Finally, we gave in. Grabbed three little chocolate mints. They disappeared. Then we grabbed another. We may or may not have eaten it. We’re not sure. We sort of blacked out for a while.

It was late. The Eagles were playing like, well, the Seahawks. It was our sixth NFL playoff game of the weekend. The space heater was doing its thing, the TV room was toasty and we don’t remember if we kept popping those little suckers in our mouth or not. When we regained our senses, Baker Mayfield was squirting someone with a water bottle and we were not sure what the final score was.

Ever have such a spell? Cruddy games caused it, we’re certain. A bunch of blowouts. One close game that featured a sloppy second half. Super Wild Card Weekend was false marketing this year.

Which can only mean playoff expansion is on the way. Or more games are headed to streaming for billions. Either way, we probably won’t have much interest in watching. Unless whomever the Hawks hire to replace Pete Carroll turns out to be the next coming of Bill Belichick. Or Belichick himself.

• By the way, we checked. We only ate four of those suckers. We fell asleep – our snoring gave us away, according to someone who was there. And the Buccaneers won 32-9.

• What’s the next step in college football’s transformation? We think we can answer that question. In the not-so-distant future, a well-funded program, say USC to the Trojans under our bus, will need to replace its football coach. Said program will not just stop at hiring a new coach. It will hire him, his entire staff and every player he wants from his old school.

Want to be successful? At the end of the season, fire everyone and replace the whole group with new folks.

It’s a win-win. Except for the folks let go. And the programs stripped for parts. And fans of just about every school.

But it seems to be the next evolutionary step. It’s already happened to a conference. No, honestly. Isn’t that exactly what happened to the Pac-12? The networks weren’t happy with the won/loss records of the Big Ten, Big 12 and ACC (as judged by ratings), so they decided to rework the product. Four schools here, four schools there and poof, the whole thing is pretty well gone.

That’s the macro change. The micro change is going to on within the coaching hires. The transfer portal, NIL and court rulings have opened a door. Everyone is going to walk through it. Find new ways to exploit any advantage.

Before you know it, schools won’t be hiring new coaches. They’ll be hiring a new group of players, who will bring their hand-picked coaches along.

Wait, that might be the mints talking. The hierarchy of college football won’t change, will it? The coaches are the top of the pyramid. The administrators, including school presidents and chancellors, a rung down and the players the big blocks at the bottom.

Unless, of course, the NLRB’s lawsuit against USC, the Pac-12 and the NCAA changes the definition from players to employees. Then watch out. Think things are out-of-control now? You haven’t seen anything yet.

Now, can please pass the chocolate? We have a craving.

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WSU: Victors. Spoils. All that ancient jargon. Maybe Paul Hunham could tell us in Latin or something the amount of awards the Cougar players won this week. No? Greg Woods can, though in English. He has all that in this story. … Elsewhere in the Pac-12 and the nation, Arizona is said to be ready to announce a new coach. All signs point to San Jose State’s Brent Brennan, though former WSU player Johnny Nansen, who just left for Texas, is expected to have a role or might be the last-minute choice. … It’s official, Jedd Fisch is the new Husky coach. And he seems to be bringing the entire Arizona offensive staff with him. That’s what got us going this morning. … It’s also official. Caleb Williams is entering the NFL draft. And USC has added another defensive coach. … John Canzano had a mailbag on his site yesterday. We read it. You can too. … Hey, Oregon State is still attractive to Power Four players. … Colorado is still attracting assistants. … Former WSU quarterback Jayden de Laura is headed to Texas State, where the offensive staff has Mike Leach connections. … Arizona has lost another quarterback to the portal. No, not the starter. Yet. Did the administrations inaction cause Fisch to leave? We pass along one yes vote. … In basketball news, we can pass along this wrapup of the women’s weekend from the Mercury News. The poll is linked below in the Gonzaga section. … Four of the top eight schools are from the Pac-12. One unranked team is Oregon State, which has the player of the week. … Colorado jumped to No. 3 in the poll. … Does eighth-ranked Stanford have enough offense to win a title? … There were a lot of whistles in the L.A. showdown over the weekend. … On the men’s side, the Beavers are looking for toughness. … Colorado is finally fully healthy. Will it help? … Utah received a triple-double from a surprise source. … The Los Angeles schools will make their last conference trek through the desert this weekend. … Speaking of the desert schools, both Arizona squads had trouble getting home after losses in the Northwest.

Gonzaga: The horror. The Bulldog men are no longer ranked in the Associated Press’s top-25 poll. It’s been years. Heck, there are kids on our block who never have experienced it. More than a couple, actually. Theo Lawson has the not-so-shocking news (considering the record). … The women blew out the second-best (by record) team in their conference. They also won another game handily. And fell a spot in the AP poll. Make it make sense. … Jim Meehan and Richard Fox talk about what caused that in the latest episode of the Gonzaga Basketball Insiders Podcast. You can listen here. … A Netflix documentary will feature Domantas Sabonis. … In other former GU player news, Jalen Suggs is staying healthy, which allows him to really show what he can do.

EWU and Idaho: Around the Big Sky, a former Idaho State administrator had a long and fruitful career. … Montana State’s women lost one of their better basketball players for the season.

Preps: The Mead girls went across the mountains for a Monday showdown with Seattle’s Lakeside and, behind Gracie Wenkheimer’s 27 points (nine 3-pointers), won 62-60.  

Seahawks: The Hawks’ interview list is long. And what we know only are current NFL employees.

Kraken: Even with reinforcements called in, the Kraken couldn’t keep their long winning streak going, falling 3-0 to Pittsburgh on the road. The march through the East continues today with a game in New York against the Rangers.

Mariners: The first day for international signings was Monday. The M’s inked a highly-thought-of prospect.

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• We hope to be here tomorrow. But if the snow turns into the apocalyptic mess it is forecasted to be, we may not. See, we have a doctor’s appointment on Spokane’s far North Side, and the only time we could get is at 9:05 a.m. It’s a follow-up to our recent hernia surgery. If we need to leave really early due to road issues, we may not be here. Or we will have an early, early post and miss a few things. When you are a one-person department, getting backup is tough. Until later …