Sister’s dog dilemma angers brother

Dear Annie: Through circumstances beyond our control, my husband and I recently found ourselves homeless for about a month, and we slept in our car. We had two dogs. A friend took one, but no one wanted “Rex.” Temporary boarding was not economically feasible. Keeping him in the car proved impossible. All the animal rescues and humane societies in our area were full, and they turned us down. Someone reported the situation to the authorities, and we had no choice but to take Rex to the animal shelter.

Three days later, my family members, who didn’t offer us so much as floor space during this time, heard about Rex. They never once considered taking him. When my brother and his wife found out we put Rex in the pound, they sent a newsletter to all the relatives discussing our “abuse” of the dog. They said I was hated, immoral and inhumane and should be ousted from the family.

Most family members thought the newsletter was uncompassionate. But my brother stands by his opinion, and I’ve received nasty phone messages from him on my voicemail. My elderly parents saw the letter, and my brother received a tearful call from them. This made him even angrier. We are now settled in our new home and doing well. We discovered that Rex had been adopted by a loving family, and I passed the happy word. But the message I received from my brother was, “Rex is happier without you. You are an abuser.”

How can someone you love kick you at your lowest? – Heartbroken Outcast

Dear Heartbroken: Some people are incapable of feeling compassion for other humans and overcompensate by focusing on animals. But the fact that your brother wouldn’t take Rex himself indicates he was simply looking for an excuse to berate you. You cannot make him a more loving brother. Stop listening to his messages and concentrate on your new life.